Don't believe the hype...

So everybody had to suffer through a whole pay period without any pages. If you asked me what I thought about it a month or two before, I would have probably used the words, "utter", "and", "complete", "hell," maybe even in that exact order.

During the few circulation and staff meetings I attended before the dreaded page layoff, some of my coworkers were also airing out their lament of having to drag carts out to the stacks and place them on the shelves---correctly at that. Page managers were scrambling to educate and prepare the 30+ staff members for this new arduous journey. They even printed <wasted paper> up guides on how to sort books on to the carts and how to shelve properly. One of my coworkers, bless her heart, even warned the others that paging is physically demanding, and pre-shelving stretches are a must---don't want to pull a hammy shelving Large Prints.

The time has come and gone, half of our pages have returned, and I'm wondering why I even stressed one ounce over it. I actually feel like we got the books out faster and more efficiently than when we had about 20 pages or so. Ok, a lot of the pages were bums anyways. Lazy high school kids, who spent more time talking to their friends who visited or bothering me at the circ desk or at my cubicle.

I am still being scheduled to "Page" an hour here and there, and I'm wondering if my job is the same as before, because shelving was not in the job description. I can't really complain all too much, it is a welcome break to the monotony of the circ desk. It also does give me more time to people watch from the stacks too.

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Testing from the Crackberry.

Pages make the books go round

My desk is situated right in the middle of the backroom. As far as privacy goes when it comes to conversations, these cubicle walls suck. Over the past week I have heard several arguments between various pages and the 2 page managers. It all stems from the recent county wide page layoff and rehire event. The county wanted the library to cut its costs so they decided to fire all the pages at once, hold mass interviews, and only rehire half of them back at the starting wages. I'll be the first to admit that the starting page wage is very decent compared to the amount of work required, but some of these pages have worked for years and have accumulated yearly raises that rival my hourly wage. There is one page here who has been here for 17 years, 17 freaking years of sorting and shelving.

Anyways, so the rehired pages had to go through a whole interview process that tested their sorting prowess and tested their commitment to the straight shelves and spines out. They had to sign a clause saying that they will be entirely flexible to the scheduling needs of each branch that hires them. In short, they had to join the Dark Side and pledge their utter and complete allegience to the library system.

I have heard at least 2 different pages argue with the page managers over how they do not like the new scheduling procedures and another one cried because this branch was not her first choice to work at. I have overheard the page managers use the argument that, "this isn't the same job as before." The pages are still shelving and sorting the same old books like before so there's a discrepency there. Oh wait, this isn't the same job, it pays less and sucks even more now.

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They callin' me...

Why is it that whenever I'm scheduled to cover the phones, there are long periods where no one calls. The second after I get a call, someone else calls right then and there. Oh, and I'm posting this during my telephone coverage hour... Multitasking is fantastic.

Fail

Yeah, I have not been keeping up with this.

What's in a Name? part 1

There's not much to do during down times at the library, you could read but why would you want to do that?
I have resorted to people watching from the circ desk. I have also gotten very good at guessing patrons ages +/- 3 years, but it only works for female patrons. Needless to say I get bored at work often (see exhibit 1a: photo album of the library).
It's even worse when I'm not working the desk. So what to do when I'm working the phones? Well, I do have the library's entire database at my disposal. I began to query odd names to see what hits I would get. It just started out as something to give off the appearance that I am actually doing backroom work to anyone who passes by but when I realized how many 'unusual' names there are, I started to write them all down.
Aided by my PICAW (partner in crime at work), Rebecca, we've come up with a pretty impressive list so far: first and middle names only. There are only so many people in the library database so this is not as extensive or thoroughly researched as the one case in Freakonomics. But it is funny to see what names do come up, they are all broken down by topic and there are several sections.

So what is in a name? Apparently, geographic locations are very popular. Is it because it is the place of their conception? Birth? I don't know, maybe I'll ask Denmark next time. But we do have a well-represented United Nations in the library system.


Geographic Locations
Africa
America
Antigua
Argentina
Asia
Austria
Bari
Benin
Bolivia
Brazil
Burma
Canada
Chad
China
Cuba
Denmark
Dominica
Egypt
England
Eritrea
Ethiopia
France
India
Iran
Ireland
Israel
Italia
Jordan
Kenya
Mali
Milan
Niger
Oman
Paris
Romania
Rome
Somalia
Spain
Sudan
Tonga
Trinidad
Tunisia
Wales
Zaire
Zambia

States
Florida
Georgia
Illinois
Indiana
Louisiana
Maine
Maryland
Montana
Nevada
Virginia
Washington

New Year's Resolutions

Did everyone make their New Year’s Resolution to use the library to save money? The amount of patrons and check outs (ins) has multiplied significantly with the new year. Plus the fact that there is a freeze on new hires has also exacerbated this issue. Every time I am at the Circ Desk it is nonstop. If there isn’t a mountain of materials to check in, it’s a long line of people waiting to check items out. It makes the day go by much faster than just sitting around but the library’s whole new motto of “doing more with less” is starting to burn me out. If you are reading this as a patron of your local library, please be patient with your library staff, and if you work in the library – I feel your pain, you’re not alone.

Sick Librarian Humor, I Gots It

I was working on the afternoon 'Holds-List' when I scanned one book and it was being transferred to a neighboring branch.

It was for a "Lee, Sara" and the book was 'Martha Stewart's Wedding Cakes.'

Am I the only one who finds it funny that a Sara Lee is reading Martha Stewart's Wedding Cakes?

sigh
I need a new job...

I Despise Romance Novels...

I despise romance novels. You know the ones where the cover art has some shirtless Fabio looking flamer holding some half dressed floozy in his arms, preferably over some cliff looking over the ocean, both of their hair is windswept, and its usually depicted during a sunset. Yes, those horrible books. But my hatred is not just reserved for those outlandish titles alone, Nicholas Sparks I'm looking your way---Damn you and your Notebook. I blame these so-called "romance" novels for the high failure rate of marriages/relationships in this country.

Its not that I don't believe in love or romance but I think these books put an extraordinary extraterrestrial-high level of standards that girls expect their boyfriends/spouses to live up to. I really don't think that these books preach the morals and virtues of what love really is anyways.
Case in point, have you ever read any of the titles of these books? They've become quite the topic of discussion at work whenever we come across them. Its like MadLibs for trashy books: "The [insert adjective] woman finds true love with a [insert foreign ethnicity] millionaire and move away to [insert exotic location]."
Really, these types of books are cookie cutter stories. They're all the same, once you've read A Scandalous Mistress I really don't see the need to read His Lady Mistress. Take one lonely, loveless woman, one rich bastard, and an exotic locale and there you go.

Females always hope for the day to find some foreign bazilliionaire who will sweep them off their feet and take them to some far away mansion. Honestly, do you really think the chances of that are worth holding out for? Don't you think that said rich guy would want to find a rich lady instead of someone looking to marry for just the money? If that did happen, all you would be is another one of his "bought possession s," which could ultimately be replaced with the snap of his fingers and his man servant has his next wife to be flying in on his G-5. If anything these books espouse the complete opposite of what love is. Is it really romantic if some guy were to make you his "mistress?" I suppose just as long as the guy was rich everything would work out. Before I turn this into something sentimental and lose my sarcastic edge: love is about understanding, accepting and working together through the ups and downs on each others flaws and insecurities. Love is not dependent on money alone --- Do you think someone who won the Nobel Prize in Chemistry would sweep a high school dropout off their feet and turn out to live happily ever after?

On a few occasions I've encountered husbands who are checking these books, either in or out, for their wives and when I look at the covers and look at their faces, there is a look of sad resignation, like a part of their soul died with each romance novel their wife read. One guy commented to me, "There are all these books around (waves his arm toward the vast expanse of paper bound knowledge) and my wife chooses to read these. I asked her if she wanted me to pick up a mystery book for her, 'no,' she said she'll stick with these [looks with great disdain at the handful of romance books]." He sighed heavily and headed towards the exit with this new delivery of literary trash for his wife to read. He walked away with his head hung low and his shoulders slumped, and I knew he just died inside.

Librarians Against Renewal Driving

One of my coworkers was working the in house telephones one day when he got a call from a patron asking to renew their books. It was obvious they were calling from their cell phone---in their car---while driving. I have no idea what possessed this person to think that they really should be renewing their books while maneuvering a one ton, explosive gasoline driven metal projectile of possible carnage. Well, this patron was so engrossed in reading off their library card number that they did not notice that they were driving through a red light and they got into an accident. I wouldn't be surprised if this super-genius had a key card and they were trying to read off the numbers from the ignition. The last thing people should be worrying about while driving is renewing their books. Please don't ever call me while I am working the phone lines when you are driving or I will hang up on you without hesitation. Oh, don't worry, their overdues got renewed.
- a message from LARD, Librarians Against Renewal Driving.